Cards/Mets - Game 6

BBBBBBBBBBBLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKK.

Seemed more mature than [expletive deleted].

Because I have no where else to turn, I'm blaming this on Will Leitch. Hey, Will: 1's an aberration, 2's a coincidence, 3's a trend. 0-6? Stay the fuck out of Shea tomorrow. STAY OUT. I don't care if Aurora Snow invites you into her skybox for a private 'hide the wiener' show.

Just kidding, Will. Not blaming you. Stay the fuck out of Shea tomorrow.

Odds and ends from tonight's game:

- First inning killed the Cardinals. Maine was clearly nervous in the first half inning. Second and third with 1 out, then bases loaded with 2 out, couldn't get a run in. That, coupled with Reyes' HR, allowed the rook to settle down. Cardinals don't get another hit until Belliard's leading off the seventh.

- Bottom of the seventh inning was like being slowly bled to death. Spiezio ALMOST catches Tucker's dying quail. LaRussa guesses Tucker's stealing on a 2-2 count, Molina air mails the throw into CF. Eckstein makes a great stop of Reyes' grounder, no play. Reyes takes second on what should have been Defense Indifference. Looper almost hits Lo Duca with a 1-0 pitch, and, not wanting to face Beltran with the bases loaded, gives in enough to allow the 2 run single. Ball game.

- Second Guess Corner: Why hit for Carpenter in the seventh? He'd only thrown 76 pitches, and with Belliard at first and one out, it was a good bunt situation. If you're trying to make something happen, why not use your best pinch-hitter, Taguchi? I don't understand that move. Although had Duncan gone with the 1-2 pitch instead of trying to pull it, he might have singled to left. Or he could have hit into a 6-4-3 DP vice a 4-6-3 DP. Who the hell knows.

Oliver Perez to get the start tomorrow. Jeff Suppan on the bump for the Redbirds. Perez was shaky in his last start, and is going on short rest. St. Louis must, MUST jump ahead early tomorrow - get into his head, give Suppan a working margin, turn this game into another Game 3. They will have a good shot at winning in that scenario. If NY scores first, it just gets harder, like pushing a boulder uphill.

Not sure how much blogging will be done for the World Series should NY make the comeback. We'll see. However, I do expect the pitching to be Verlander Game 1, Rogers Game 2, Bonderman Game 3, Robertson Game 4. This sets up Rogers to feed off the home crowd twice if need be, and gives your most experienced fireballer the nod in Game 7 should it get there.

Cards/Mets - Game 5

I can't take this. No more. God Damn these guys. Why? Because I'm back on the bandwagon full speed now. I've been cautiously optimistic this post-season, especially after a horrendus regular season. Pujols' oblique. Edmonds' concussion. Mulder's arm falls off. Izzy turns into the Tin Man from the waist down. Sidney Ponson. Jason Marquis losing 13 of his last 16 decisions. Eckstein's oblique/hamstring. Thompson can't get anyone out. Molina, the double play machine. Rolen's shoulder strength deserts him. Two 8-game losing streaks. 1-9 against AL teams not named 'Kansas City'. The 'end of the season debacle' that almost was.

But now, they've given me hope. I'm starting to believe the Cardinals are the team of destiny this season, not Detroit; how else to explain the resurgence of Weaver, the suddenly rock solid bullpen (less Thompson and Hancock), the rest of the lineup picking up AP's tender hamstring?

I've got the same euphoric feeling I had after AP's bomb left Ten-Run last October. The belief that we've got this thing won now. We beat their best. They're running scared. I had those hopes dashed last year. I don't know if I can handle that again this time.

This marks the fifth time the Cardinals have won 3 games in a 7 game series since their last World Championship. Three of the previous 4 times they've lost the series (1985, 1987 World Series; 1996 NLCS). You've come this far, you can't stop now. Win that fourth game. Send the arrogant Mets packing. Send Fox brass into convulsions. Send me to bed happy.

I don't care what happens in the World Series. Winning it all is beyond our wildest expectations, so let's just keep that crazy thought out there, shall we? But I want to get there now. This team probably won't look the same next season (Edmonds, Mulder, Suppan, Marquis, maybe Rolen, maybe Izzy, moving on?). I want another crack with this group. I want to avenge that egg we laid in 2004. I want to see my NL team, hell any NL team, win a World Series game. Especially I want to see Carpenter pitch on the biggest stage.

So close them out tomorrow.

Cards/Mets - Game 4

I turned it off after Delgado's 2RBI ground rule double. I'd seen enough thank you very much.

Items to ponder from tonight's bloodletting:

- I understand that Duncan/LaRussa believed Reyes was tipping his pitches. I wasn't paying that close of attention to his windup motion, and they are far more experienced in spotting that stuff from the dugout than I from 1500 miles away while peering at the game in HD. And it does explain how 0 for 11 David Wright could launch a ball to the back of the Met bullpen, which remains his only hit in this series. But from the stretch he negotiated the fourth pretty well. At this point he had given up 3 hits and 2 ER. Not bad. Why not let him pitch in the 5th? Of course, this is sooooo much easier to say now that we know Brad Thompson will only retire 1 guy in the fifth, and Hancock won't get anyone out in the sixth. But while allowing for my rose-colored glasses filtering the past, it still seems like LaRussa overthought this one.

Duncan and LaRussa have jealously protected Reyes' arm all season. He's only thrown over 100 pitches once, and that was 27 Sep against San Diego. This would seem to be a good game to go slightly over that mark (he had thrown 86 through 4 innings). But what do I know? I'm a balding, slightly overfat white guy chowing down at my in-laws house during the game. Makes for a pretty picture, eh?

- Wonder how much different the game would have been had Belly Lard not been thrown out at third in the second inning. Oquendo gets the blame for this one. I think, with the pitcher on deck, that he should have held Belliard at second. Reyes then sacrifices the runners to second and third, respectively, and then Eckstein hits - he who led off the game with a single. We could have gotten to Perez for more runs early, and that may have changed the outcome. I think the Mets achieved a slight momentum shift with that play, and they kept it rolling with the solo HR's in the third. Then the Cardinal bullpen blew up, removing all the suspense from this one.

So on to a CRITICAL Game 5. The good news: Glavine's pitching on three days rest. Historically, he hasn't excelled in these situations (2-5, 6.75; last time 7 June 06, 6 runs in 5 2/3 innings). Bad news: so is Weaver, who has never started on 3 days rest. Oh, goody.

Cards/Mets - Game 3

Yep, skipped right over last night's game - although there is a reference to it here. I had hoped the Redbirds would be in this position after 3 games, but didn't really expect it. Playing with house money is fun, isn't it?

Wouldn't it figure that the worst Cardinal team this millenium (in terms of won/loss record) would be one that makes it into the World Series?

Comments from tonight's extravaganza:

- What's with the random facts about players? Endy Chavez's brother's name? Shawn Green's favorite childhood book? Scott Spiezio headlines a garage band...actually that would partially explain that unbelieveably gay thing he has growing on his face. The only thing gayer is Inge's (Nice landing strip, douche). Stick to the germane statistics. 'My favorite book is Curious George Goes To The Hospital' is only mildly interesting when the player is 12 years old or younger. And even then only to his/her relatives, who probably already know that. As for me, I don't care.

- Can we finally establish that the Cardinals can't hit left-handed starting or long relief pitching? Wells (5 IP, 2 ER), Glavine (7 IP, 0 ER), Oliver (6 IP, 0 ER). 18 innings, 2 runs. This is why other teams sign any non-comatose leftie and rush him to the mound when the Cards come to town, because the Cardinals can't hit them. Cardinals can never hit these guys. I know historically this is true, I just don't have the Elias stats book to back it up. Think Randolph wishes he'd started Oliver tonight? Don't think I expect Perez (3-13. THREE AND THIRTEEN and he gets the Game 4 start. Wow) to throw 6 shutout innings tomorrow? You bet I do. I will need more booze for tomorrow's game. Lots more.

- Rolen looked good tonight. Maybe LaRussa was playing a mind game with him last night. He played with a chip on the bad shoulder tonight, and played well.

- Until the 9th, I thought they were playing that game in a mausoleum. These are the greatest fans in baseball? More like the quietest fans in baseball. What the hell? Good God, conventions for mimes have more sound (From what I've heard. Second-hand. And we kicked his ass afterwards for bringing it up. How 'bout dem Bears?). You could hear McCarver's train of thought the entire game, which is never a good thing.

I've worn the same 'Retire #51' shirt last night and tonight. This shirt won't be washed again until the Cardinals' season is over. Hopefully that's around Halloween.

Here's hoping Reyes vs. ChiSox shows up tomorrow, not Reyes vs. Brewers.

The Curse of Lou Brock?

For years, we were forced to listen to angst-ridden BoSox fans moan about the 'Curse Of The Bambino'. You know the drill: 5 world series victories with Ruth, 86-year drought without him, and the team he went to won 26 in the interim. So when the Red Sox swept my Cardinals 2 years ago there was a catharsis of emotion poured out from all over New England - and beyond. And a proliferation around this sleepy West Coast town of Red Sox hats, shirts, shorts, bumper stickers, license plate holders, sex toys, beer bongs, whatever could hold a logo. Effin bandwagoners.

But it did create some speculation on why the Redbirds had not won a World Series since the Darrell Porter-led team in 1982. Some popular opinion has lain this drought at the feet (or in the coke straw) of Keith Hernandez. Nay, nay, moosebreath. This curse goes all the way back to 1968.


For the record, Lou Brock was my favorite Cardinal as a kid (recently replaced by So Taguchi. It's not just a name, it's a chant! It's a question! It's a game winning HR!). However, getting thrown out at the plate during Game 5 of the 1968 World Series is a defining moment in the history of the Cardinals. Statistics to back this up:

Cardinals post-season results up to 1968:
World Series Champions (8): 1926, 1931, 1934, 1942, 1944, 1946, 1964, 1967
National League Champs (3): 1928, 1930, 1943

Cardinals post-season results since 1968:
World Series Champions (1): 1982
National League Champs (4): 1968, 1985, 1987, 2004

An interesting fact is that, in terms of overall World Series won/loss record, going into game 5 of the 1968 World Series the franchise was only 34-33. It's pretty amazing, then, that they had won 8 of the 11 World Series they appeared in. They remain the only team in the NL that has won more World Series than they have lost against the vaunted Yankees (3 of 5), and have played them more than once (so stuff it Marlins and D'Backs fans).

But since that play, the Redbirds are only 10-18 in World Series Play, and have lost 4 of their last 5 appearances.

Luckily there is a cure: to reverse the 'curse' you must defeat those who have tortured you the most. Boston turned this trick by beating the Yanks in the 04 ALCS, then the Cardinals in the World Series (they were 0-2 against STL, losing in 1946 and 1964). The Cardinals must reverse this trend by beating Detroit in a World Series.

There's no time like the present.

Cards/Mets - Game 1

I ended up not watching this entire game as I thought I would. Instead, I was down at the Yard House in Gaslamp helping a buddy celebrate and reminisce before he heads off to Iraq. Gonna play with the EOD folks looking for IEDs. Kind of sobers you up, doesn't it? So there won't be much on the funny tonight. Especially with the 2-0 result.

Can't say this result surprises. Jeff Weaver did, in fact, pitch his butt off for 5 2/3 innings, but that one pitch sent me into convulsions, and revived memories of Beltran wearing that hideous alternate Astros jersey two years ago, You know, the one that makes them look like the Dairy Queen Astros. What's he hitting now, .700 against the Cards in his playoff career?

Other things to ponder going into Game 2:

- Do you really think LaRussa agonized over giving Carp the start tomorrow on normal rest like the papers made it out he did? C'mon. Even for an over-thinker like LaRussa, that decision was a no-brainer.

- So much for AP's vaunted base running. Got to be better tomorrow.

- Having Rolen start again tomorrow makes sense for this reason - the Mets start a rookie. Here's a chance for Rolen to get his hacks against a kid. I would really like to see him drive the ball tomorrow night, even if the hit turns into just a loud out. Would probably do him a world of good on the confidence scale. If he looks as pathetic tomorrow as he did in Games 2 and 3 of the NLDS, LaRussa should start Spiezio for the rest of the series at third. I'll take the defensive hit. We need another bat in the lineup.

- At least we had some hard outs. But the Mets are a better defensive team than I thought. No breaks tonight at the plate. The Cardinals need to be more patient at the dish. They should have known Glavine would try and paint that damn outside corner all night, with the occasional inside pitch. You have to work the count to have success against him, and they really didn't. With a rookie going tomorrow, and all that adrenalin, he could be all over the place. They'd BETTER be patient. Hammer the good pitch when you get it. Remember, the Dodgers ate this guy up early in the game.

One more thought: Last year Carp beat the Astros 5-3 in Game 1. Game 2: Oswalt shuts down the Cards 4-1. To anyone who knows anything about the game Oswalt was (and is) the Astros ace. Just like Carp is St. Louis' ace. Now I'm not such a rah-rah Cardinals fan to suggest that Weaver/Suppan/Reyes backing up Carpenter are the equivalent of Pettite/Clemens/Rodriguez behind Oswalt, but there's a parallel here. Our ace is pitching tomorrow. All the road team ever wants out of the first two games is a split. Houston did it last year and went to the World Series. We can still do that. And, as we took 2 of 3 from NY(N) in our park earlier this season, we're very much in this series. Suppan's 7-2 at home, Reyes is a tough hombre with a plus fastball and changeup, Weaver has thrown 10 2/3 innings this postseason with an ERA under 2. Win tomorrow, take 2 of 3 at home, and bring Carp back on regular rest for Game 6.

I said it before the series, and I'll say it now: Cards in 6. As Captain Caveman might say, your comments are welcome.

Lou Piniella - MOTO

Some of the pearls of wisdom that issued from the mouth of Sweet Lou during ALCS Game 1:

Lou on Joe Blanton: "He's a pitcher!"

Lou on Rickey Henderson: "He's the greatest leadoff hitter ever!" (this comment immediately followed Thom Brenneman's observation that Henderson was the greatest leadoff hitter in MLB history.)

Lou on Dave Duncan: "He's really helped [the Cardinals]."

Sweet Lou may be a kick-ass manager, but as a descriptive commentator he's out of his depth in a puddle. Stick to analyzing managerial moves, like Milton Bradley taking off for third down by 5 runs in the eighth. Leave the elaboration to those who completed grade school.

For the love of God, please please please please please please PLEASE don't team this Master of the Obvious with Joe Buck and Tim McCarver to call the World Series. My head might explode like a FEMBOT.

Hooray! We're champions of ..... what?

So now that the first round of baseball playoffs are over, let's take a quick look at the various celebrations, shall we?

Nice harmony shot here. Appropriate eyewear, celebratory faces, not too much silliness. After all, this is just the division round.

Is it just me, or does Carlos Delgado look none too pleased about being douched with cheap champagne?

The only way to enjoy Budweiser products responsibly.

Nice to get the crowd involved after 19 years of futility. What are you going to do for an encore if you advance deeper?

Which brings us, nicely, to the question: Why do major league teams break out the bubbly after every round of the playoffs? MLB is the only major sports league that does this. You didn't see the Redskins go all New Year's Eve after knocking out the Buccaneers in last year's playoffs, and you'll never see an NHL team do that after advancing past any playoff tier (probably because the cost of champagne would bankrupt most small market franchises if they advanced through all 900 rounds of the Stanley Cup Playoffs).

I can see celebrating the playoffs on the field. But you haven't really WON anything. And although it wouldn't really shock me to find out MLB is required by the French government to buy 1500 cases of cheap champagne each year for these celebrations, this is just silly. You need to keep this in perspective, Detroit. You need to work up to the big celebrations. You've left yourself very little room for improvement on that impromptu celebration after vanquishing the Yankees, short of (a) crucifying Matt Millen on the mound, (b) burning down Chicago, or (c) invading Canada.

Seeing as the 'tradition' is too ingrained at this point, allow us at the Stance to suggest some alternate methods of celebrating as you progress through the playoffs.

1. Clinch Playoff Spot: Congratulations. You've bested 22 other teams and are still alive for that big World Series winner's share! You've got illigitimate children to feed. Have a Coke on the house. Feel free to spray it around the locker room; it doesn't sting, and it celebrates your status as a beneficiary of the greatest capitalist free-market system in the world. Where else but the US can you make $250,000 to warm the bench?

2. Win Division Series: You've succeeded in spite of yourself. It never hurts to have Grady Little managing your opponent. 2-32 with runners in scoring position? How did you win, again? This calls for a celebration, with a sobering reminder of how close you came to this. A little Martinelli's Sparkling Cider is just the understated thing. You may wish to drink your cares away, but management wants you alert and sober for the LCS.

3. Win League: Now we're getting somewhere! This may be a time to celebrate with gusto - after all, you get a stylish ring to commemorate your victory - but your work still isn't done. You don't want to be the 2004 Cardinals, just 'happy to be here', do you? No, you want to keep your edge. So celebrate the way working men have for generation(s) - with beer. But not any beer, the 'Champagne of Beers' - because although you've taken a big step, this is still a crappy beverage, and will always leave you wanting something more. Like a sandwich. Or a nap.

4. Win World Series: Draw your own conclusions. But choose wisely, because we don't want to see this ever again:

Cards/Pads - Game 4

I'm quite sure Cardinal Nation's collective heart was in its collective throat during the top of the first. To escape that situation with only 2 runs allowed was very fortunate. Frankly I expected Carp to only last 5 innings tops, and then leave the Redbirds to take their chances (in what hopefully was either a tie game or StL with a small lead) on how their bullpen fared.

Instead, Carp made it to the 8th. And thanks to a wholly unexpected Cla Meredith meltdown, StL had a 6-2 lead at the time.


Well done, boys. Cards 6, Pads 2. St. Louis wins series 3-1.

So it's on to NY and a date with the Mets. Once again, the starting rotation is the hot topic of concern going into the series. I would expect the two Jeffs - Weaver and Suppan - to start Games 1 and 2, respectively. LaRussa might try and bring Carp back on 3 days rest for Game 2, taking into account Soup's record at home this year, but I doubt it. Will Anthony Reyes see any action in this series? Of course, he'd have to be activated first. I fully expect he will be, which means Jason Marquis won't be - and we're a better team that way. Reyes might - MIGHT - pitch game 4 of the series. I would think either StL would be up 3-0 or down 0-3 for that to happen. There's really no pressure in either of those situations; lose Game 4 when up 3-0 and you still have game 5; lost Game 4 when down 3-0 and you get swept (since only 1 baseball team has ever come back from 3-0 down to win the series, you have to expect you're going to lose it anyway).

Other news and notes from the baseball day:

- Glad to see Scott Rolen finally admitted his shoulder was bugging him. He fouled out to first twice in Game 2, and it was pretty clear to me sitting in that park that he wasn't right. Game 3 he actually squared around to bunt. I remember him trying to do that last year in June (after he came back from the first failed surgery) because he knew he had no chance to drive the ball. He also didn't hit a ball out of the infield yesterday. So good for him to tell his manager he had a problem.

However, shame on him for playing 'I have a secret' with LaRussa. And additionally shame on him for whining about the day off he got a few weeks ago (even though it obviously helped him). I'm sure that made it harder for LaRussa to consider holding him out of the lineup. I hope LaRussa's gut has been screaming at him all this time to sit Rolen. If it wasn't, he is an even shittier leader than some think he is already. How can you not know when your people are in trouble? How can you not be willing to make the tough call here? You're the MANAGER. It's your job.

- If the Yankees fire Torre (9 straight AL East titles? 4 World Series titles?), Stienbrenner is an IDIOT. Oh, never mind - he already is.

See you Wednesday for NLCS game 1.

Cards/Pads - Game 3

Well, the Cardinals were living a charmed life. AP had carried them through 2 games - could he complete the sweep?

No.

Pads 3, Cards 1.

Woody Williams vs Chris Carpenter tomorrow. Wood's 1-2 lifetime vs the Redbirds. However, for those wondering why he's starting and not Peavy, Wood was the hottest pitcher the Pads had the last 6 weeks of the season. Of course, Carp is the best StL has.

Prediction: If StL can't close out the series tomorrow, they aren't winning Monday in SD. Take that to the bank.

Thanks to the Yankees laying an egg against Detroit, at least we can look forward to lots of National League baseball on Fox during the League Championship Series - instead of FX where it would have been relegated to had the Yanks pulled through.

Some more news and notes from the day in baseball:

- Chris Duncan really, truly, is a horrible outfielder. He's worse than Reggie Sanders, if that's possible. Love the attempt to catch Todd Walker's drive in the first inning with his left knee. Uh, Chris: that's what the glove is for. Of course, I can see why he didn't trust the leather, after dropping a ball that HIT THE GLOVE in the eighth. Although they awarded Bowen a hit, come on. I can play LF better than Chris Duncan, and that's not saying much for me.

- Anyone besides me expecting to find A-Rod in the University of Texas clock tower sometime in the next year?

- Grady Little has no more idea how to manage a major league game than my 2-month old son. To wit: today, bottom of 5, LA has all the momentum in the world after erasing a 4-0 deficit and taking a 5-4 lead with 2 out. Olmedo Saenz is his best pinch hitter. Here's a chance to take firm control of the game. His choice: one-legged Nomar. Predictably, Nomar hits back to the box to end the inning. Way to go for the jugular, Grady. Someone should have told him the "one-legged man comes up with the huge hit at Chavez Ravine" Magic card was cashed in 1988. NY(N) comes out, scores 3 in the 6th, and never looks back.

Although any manager who uses Brett Tomko twice in relief deserves to lose.

- When a pitcher is struggling, you DON'T swing at the first pitch he throws to you. You hear that, Kenny Lofton and JD Drew? No, I didn't think so.

- Kudos to the Detroit Tigers - now THAT's how you celebrate a series win. Well done. In that vein, if I was Commissioner of Baseball, my third act (after banning the DH and ending interleague play) would be to require the World Series trophy presentation to occur on the field. Just like the rest of the major North American sports do. It's time to reward the fans who shell out $150 to take a family of 4 to the ball park with seeing the presentation.

Until tomorrow, sports fans...

Cards/Pads - Game 2

Why I like being on active duty, reason #6 - special liberty. Special liberty is a way for someone to get time off work for any reason, so long as your CO (commanding officer) approves it. So much more ethically satisfying than lying about being sick today and having to explain the sunburn tomorrow; instead, it's 'yeah I went skiing yesterday, you signed my chit. So what?'. Beautiful.

My buddy RW managed to get 4 tickets to Game 2. I submitted a Special Liberty chit (think memo with approval signatures) and got today off, allowing me and Mrs. Rant to join him and another friend at the ball park. A can't miss good time. And it didn't.

Some pictures you won't see on Sportscenter:

The View from our seats. How's that work day going?

Navy LEAPFROGS. Another bene of living in San Diego - steely eyed killers PARACHUTE into the stadium before big games. Note the precision landing, and shameless home team advertising. This guy's from StL and cried himself to sleep last night.

"Now Meester Poo-holes, I vill zimply ztretch the mussckle vor du. Dis von't hurt a bit. "

"Goddamn that guy. Every time he tries to touch me here."

Random thoughts from today's game:

- I hope whatever kool-aid pitcher Bochy drinks from gets shared with Grady Little, Willie Randolph, and the ALCS winning manager. You keep RIGHT ON pitching to AP. Never mind he's the only guy in the Cardinal lineup that can consistently hurt you.

- It's almost as if the Cardinals and Padres have switched the roles they were playing last week. The Padres can't hit, and they look like a bunch of little leaguers out there. Blum 'forgets' to cover second on a rundown? Walker 'can't' get the ball out of his glove to throw Edmonds out at first? Wow. I feel for Dave Roberts - although he got burned on Preston Wilson's double leading off the fourth, he looks like the only guy out there really laying it all on the line for the Padres. Of course, I hope SD continues to sleepwalk through Soup's start on Saturday. In the meantime, the Cards are getting solid pitching (ERA through 2 games: 0.50. That is not a typo), great defense (who knew Belly Lard had that kind of range?), and just enough clutch AP. Fantastic. A great 2 days to be a Cards fan in SD.

- Saturday's a day game. Cards now 39-19 with the sun up. Hey FOX Sports: Assuming the Cards close the Padres out this weekend, can all the NLCS games be afternoon starts? Can we start the World Series games in the mid-afternoon too? You want to bring the children back to the game, right? RIGHT?

More later this week. Rooting hard for Dodgers to pull off the miracle series victory vs. Mets.

Tribute to the man

We wouldn't be worth our salt here at 'The Stance' if we didn't post a link to this item from the St. Louis Post-Dispatch website. Enjoy.


"Here stands baseball's perfect warrior. Here stands baseball's perfect knight." - Ford C. Frick

Cards/Pads - Game 1

I won't re-hash what others have said ad nauseaum ('ad nauseaum' means 'to sickness', you illiterate bastard). However, some news and notes on the first day of the playoffs:

- Think the Twins are wallowing in their own piss right now? Santana hadn't lost a game at home in almost 2 years. So much for that. Big Hurt puts a BIG HURT on the Twin Cities' hopes.

- The Padres are, on paper, the better team than the Cardinals. Especially where pitching is concerned. San Diego sports the best team ERA in the NL. Their starters are deeper, their bullpen is lights out, and their lineup does just enough to win. In fact, the only area where the Cardinals are noticeably better is.........in day games! Cardinals were 37-19 during the regular year under the sun. So I'm sure the Padres front office is REALLY pleased that both home games are being played in the afternoon. I'll bet John Moores isn't sending David Hill, president of Fox Sports, any Christmas cards this year.

- And while we're on the subject, here's the prime time game for the first 4 nights of baseball playoffs:

Tonight: Yankees /Tigers. Wed: Yankees/Tigers. Thurs: Mets/Dodgers. Fri: Yankees/Tigers. See a trend here?

This is why I hate all teams with 'New York' in them. I even include 'New Jersey' teams in this, since Northern NJ is New York's septic tank/garbage dump/drug source. I understand they are the biggest media market in the country, but they aren't the ONLY city with a sports team! Most of the 280 million Americans NOT living in or near the 5 boroughs couldn't give 2 shits about NY sports. Every fucking year come playoff time Fox Sports executives sit together in a little room, and decide how they're going to get the most NY exposure on the tube in prime time. Every year.

Normally this bias means that you'll only see 1 NL playoff game in prime time during the Division Series, at least until the Yankees either advance or are eliminated. Don't believe me? Check the broadcast times for all NLDS games played the past 3 years. I dare you.

This year is especially bad since both NY franchises are in the playoffs. To make it even more sickening, they both enter the playoffs with the best record in their respective leagues, so Fox can JUSTIFY the NY love-fest. Fox probably had to have the board room at the sports division fumigated and re-painted, because there was so much semen smeared on all the walls. So we're to be subjected to the Yankees/Mets hit parade until we go insane. Here's hoping they both make an early exit. Perfect world: Padres (or Cards) play the Dodgers, in the NLCS; Tigers play Twins (or A's) in the ALCS. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it, Hill.

- Nice to see LaRussa came to his senses and is having Weaver (4-1 on road) start game 2, with Suppan (7-1 at home) starting game 3. I don't think Weaver is a better pitcher than Suppan - quite the opposite. But if we're playing the numbers game as a starting point for giving the team the best chance of advancing, this rotation is a no-brainer.

- Nice to see LaRussa then planted his newly senses-restored head firmly up his ass by having Marquis on the active roster for the NLDS instead of Reyes. He trusts Reyes to start the last game of the season on short rest, but not to pitch in the playoffs? Decided to go with all that experience, that 'knows how to handle pressure' quality Marquis brings to the table? Did LaRussa have his mind wiped after Sunday's game? Because Marquis certainly used all that experience to good effect when his team needed him in September (0-4, ERA 8.46). So we reward medocrity? Brilliant. If Marquis throws even ONE PITCH in a close game during this series, I'm wearing a Padres jersey to every sporting event I attend, or every game I play in, for the rest of this calendar year. I play softball 4 nights a week, so you see this is no idle threat. LaRussa. What a Jackass.

Deathwatch, anti-climax day (12)

Thank-you John Smoltz. Your pitching made today's Cardinal game an afterthought. Smoltzie threw 6 shutout innings, and, courtesy of 2 Astro errors, the Braves scored 2 early runs, helping Atlanta eliminate the Astros 3-1. Which was good, since Anthony Reyes blew up in the first inning, allowing 4 Brewer runs, and the Brewers cruised to a 5-3 win. Cards hit 3 home runs in the 9th to make the final score a little more cosmetic.

Additionally, ol' LaRussa threw me a curveball with Reyes starting today. I guess he decided he'd rather save Carpenter for the potential make-up game against the Giants tomorrow, if needed; and with any luck, StL would pull through, make the playoffs today, and Carp would then be available for Game 1. A good gamble to take, especially with Smoltz starting for the Braves against a Houston rookie, and it paid off.

So the Cardinals win the NL Central, despite losing 9 of their last 12, and now we wait to see exactly who they'll be playing next week. Somewhere on the left coast, of course; hopefully against the Padres, because I might be able to get tickets to one of the games.

I'm still interested in seeing who LaRussa announces as his starters for Games 2 and 3. It looks like Carp, Weaver, Suppan. I think that makes the most sense, and that is how he's set his rotation up, but we'll see.

(Jump for joy now, AP - but you got your work cut out for you to make the LCS, much less the WS)

Deathwatch, Penultimate day (11)

For 7 innings the Cards were frustrated by failure, having left 8 runners on with no results. More exacerbating, although Milwaukee had only 5 hits, they had plated 2 runs, courtesy of Jeff Cirillo's pinch-hit 2-run single in the top of the seventh. So when Rafael Belliard lined out to right with the bases loaded in the eighth, one didn't feel good about the team's chances.

Enter Scott Spiezio.

He of the ugliest lower lip hair growth in the major leagues slapped a triple to right, scoring all 3 Cardinal runs in their 3-2 victory today at Busch III.

Ol' Tony looks relieved in that picture, doesn't he? Either that or he remembered where he left his teeth.

Unfortunately, after Atlanta tied the game in the 8th, their shoddy defense allowed 3 runs in the 9th, and they weren't able to recover, losing 5-4 to Houston.

(And while we're at it, since I'm not authorized to comment at Deadspin - all this hand-wringing is entirely appropriate. When a team you follow (and care a little too much about, yes, there I said it) is in danger of becoming a punch line for failure, and you KNOW they're capable of doing so, you hope against hope they don't. I don't want my favorite team included in the 'biggest late season chokes' discussion with the 1964 Phillies, 1969 Cubs, 1978 Red Sox, and 1995 Angels. Additionally, winning the Central Division isn't a foregone conclusion. Hou's starting pitching is better than StL's, and Cardinal hitting has been just squirrely enough to make losing this division a very very real possibility. The last 2 games have dialed down the panic, but it isn't over.)

This brings us to our alternate topic for the post: How does LaRussa organize his starters for the post-season?

Now that tomorrow's game is a must win to get in, it looks like LaRussa will start Carpenter. Let's assume he wins, and the Cards clinch. Their NLDS schedule should be Oct 3, Oct 5, Oct 7-9. Here's the rest for their starters:

Carpenter (pitches 1 Oct): 3 Oct (1 day), 5 Oct (3 days), 7 Oct (available). Suppan (pitched 30 Sep): 3 Oct (2 days), 5 Oct (available). Weaver (pitched 29 Sep): 3 Oct (3 days), 5 Oct (available). Marquis (pitched 28 Sep): 3 Oct (4 days - available). Reyes (pitched 27 Sep): 3 Oct (available).

So who starts Game 1? If I'm LaRussa, there's NO WAY Marquis pitches any more this season. In fact, I'd leave him off the active post-season roster entirely. His head is all screwed up. 0-4, 8.46 ERA in September? When your team really needed you? YOU SUCK. Only way I'd consider activating him is if we need his left handed bat as a pinch hitter. Reyes: Too young. Rick Ankiel started game 2 of the 2000 NLDS, and something in him short circuited, leading to 7 wild pitches and effectively ending his pitching career.

So, if I'm doing it, it goes like this:

Game 1: Weaver. (makes sense. 4-1 on the road as a Cardinal, 1-3 at home; 4.38 road ERA, 7.70 at home). He's a veteran who can pitch on 3 days rest.
Game 2: Carpenter. Best pitcher on the club. If Weaver falters, we'll need him to stay in the series regardless of which team we're playing. Besides...
Game 3: Suppan. Soup has been a much better pitcher at home this year (7-2 , 3.18 at home; 5-5, 5.36 on road). It makes sense to save him for the home opener. No decisions against the NL West contenders; pitched much better against LA than SD.
Game 4: Reyes (up 2-1); Weaver (down 1-2). I think we opt for the veteran if we're behind in the series. I think Reyes, who pitched very well in his last start (a game StL won and had to have) would be a good choice here if he can pitch the series clincher. Pressure, yes, but not 'if you lose, we're done' pressure. I think LaRussa should protect him this post-season; he's one of our starters for the future, and we don't need another Ankiel (see above).
Game 5: Carpenter. If you get beat, you want it to be with your best on the mound.

Of course, if they lose tomorrow and Houston wins, all this goes out the window. Then I think you're forced to start Reyes against the Giants.

Deathwatch, Day 10

Gotta hand it to the idiots at ESPN. There are games with playoff implications all over the place (Royals/Tigers, White Sox/Twins, Blue Jays/Yankees, Astros/Braves, Reds/Pirates - these are just the 4pm start games), so it makes perfect sense to leave the Phillies/Marlins game on while the Phillies cling to a 13 RUN LEAD. What was the point of this - to see if Ryan Howard would get a hit (he didn't and was lifted for a pinch runner in the 7th)? To see if Shane Victorino would get 6 hits? WTF? I guess Bill Pidto needed the work on his short-burst delivery.

(Now we interrupt Eric Karros because he has nothing intelligent to say to get an update from the Studio - BILL?

Thanks fellas - Roger Clemens is still taking bows in Atlanta after leaving the game in the 6th inning. Word has it the press box is LINING UP to blow him after the game. Back to you.

Shit, I'm missing that. Here in Miami, Philadelphia is still blowing Florida out of the building. There's more compelling baseball out there, but screw you, we're not showing it. Rick, continue telling us about the toe jam removal assistant's job.)

To today's game:

Starts off just like 5 of the last 7 games - the opponent scores a run in the first inning. And in just as exacerbating a way - Weaver has Jenkins 0-2, can't put him away, and ends up giving up the single to left that plates Graffanino. God dammit. Can't make a quality pitch when it's needed, the hallmark of a mediocre team.

Jeff did settle down, helped by DP balls in the second and fourth, to pitch pretty well. Considering he'd been shellacked at Neo-Busch since he was signed, it was nice to see him pitch almost competently. For once.

Preston Wilson put the boys in Red up to stay with a 2-run dinger in the second. And for once, the Cards found a way to hit a left hander. I need to do a search for the Cardinals' record against lefties for the last 30 years. I swear they are the meal ticket for every junk throwing, overweight, designated for assignment left hander in the business. I sometimes wonder if I could throw 3 scoreless innings against this team. Set it up like Brewster's Millions. What the hell?

Anyway, this game quickly turns into a rout, just like last night's did for the other team, capped off by AP hitting another 3-R bomb, to center this time. Cards 10, Brewers 5.

AND.....Houston was shut down by Atlanta, 4-1. So here's the scoreboard:

- Cincinnati won, they're still 3 back with 3 to play. One more Red loss, or a Cardinal win tomorrow, and they're out.
- Houston falls 2 back in the loss column with 2 to play. One more loss, coupled with a Cardinal win, and they're out.

Padres lose 3-1. Dodgers win 4-3 (on a passed ball. Nice job, Gigantes). Nothing's solved, no playoff slots filled, just another day in the wacky NL.

WHERE would this team be without this man in the middle of the lineup? (Don't answer that).

Deathwatch, Day 9

Overheard at Neo-Busch on 28 September:

"Okay, well, uh...candlesticks always make a nice gift, and uh, maybe you could find out where LaRussa and Duncan are registered and maybe a place setting or maybe a sliverware pattern. They deserve at least as much since they keep sending you out here with your garbage control and no movement shit. You call that pitching? I call it groping in the dark for your dick, jackass. Now I'm in this goddammed picture with you for all eternity. Fuck you. Oh, here's Tony. Just go into the locker room and suck on that bottle, listen to the waterfall, the soothing music, and contemplate your season next year in Tampa. Disappear, scumbag!"


"Hitting off this clown is sooo easy, it should be illegal. And THESE guys have been the cream of the division all year? wow."

"Ya know, I've had just about enough of this bullshit."

Brewers 9, Cards 4. Houston 3, Pittsburgh 0. Lead is .5 games. OK, joke's over, I'm ready to wake up now... Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Deathwatch, Day 8

First, we must correct an errata from yesterday's post: Anthony Reyes was scheduled to pitch tonight, not Jason Marquis. And based on the way he pitched, thank God.

While at the store this afternoon, Mrs. Rant asked if I wanted to buy beer. Having watched the last 2 Cardinals games sober, the answer was a reosunding HELL YES. If they're going to go down in flames, I want to be comfortable during the ride. So the first few innings played out like this:

- Return from store. Padres already winning 1-0, top of 1st. Crack that beer, baby!

- Chris Young (who the Mrs and I watched at PETCO earlier this year; he took a no-hitter into the eighth) goes through the lineup the first time allowing only a walk to Belliard (he was promptly erased as Molina hit into a DP for the 1,000,000,000th time this season). Gonna be a loooong off-season.

- Already emotionally distraught, I pass out until the bottom of the 5th. Insert "You're a flipping lightweight, DAD" joke here. I need to go on a program and get some of my dignity back.

- Need another beer. What's that? Cardinals 1, Padres 1? OK, maybe I'll pay attention.

Give the kid Reyes credit - after a shaky first, and almost beaning Piazza in the third, he pitched very well. Especially considering (a) the Cardinals had 3 hits until the 8th, and (b) C. Young is one of the toughest road pitchers in the NL this season.

The 7th inning is where it started to get interesting.

After we called LaRussa on his lazy-ass managing style yesterday, Cardinal management re-grouped and decided to replace the Animatronic LaRussa with the real one. This one watched Reyes miss with the first 6 pitches of the 7th inning and removed him in favor of Randy Flores. Where was this urgency yesterday in the 7th inning? (I don't care if the real LaRussa was encased in carbonite for the past week. I'm still pissed about yesterday's game.)

The Cards successfully negotiated the 7th. In the 8th, Mike Cameron hit against Braden Looper, leading to the following heart attack timeline:

- Heart in stomach: Cameron BLISTERS the ball down third base way.
- Relief: Rolen speared the line drive.
- Euphoria: They're gonna double Kahlil Greene off second.
- Disgust: Rolen threw the ball into RF.

Looked like the 'Hate Cardinals Voodoo Doll' my ex-wife keeps was working its magic again, especially after Tyler Johnson bounced a pitch to the plate and Molina, deciding to keep his liquid-cooled hockey helmet on, couldn't find it. 2-1 Padres. Cardinals do catch a break when Gonzalez is thrown out at home trying to score on the same play.

Bottom of 8: This time Bochy has a senior moment. Linebrink has nothing, but is left in to walk 2 and get 2 outs before Meredith (who has pitched every day since August 1, it seems) is brought in to pitch to AP.
Cue the music. 3 RUN BOMB. 4-2 Cards. Free Big Macs for EVERYBODY!!!

Adam Wainwright succumbs to his idolization of Izzy long enough to allow a 2-out double to one of the 11 Padre catchers (bringing the tying run to the plate), but he retires Dave Roberts on a ground out.

CARDS WIN!!! CARDS WIN!!! (Fuck you Cubs fans - Harry Caray worked for us first.)

So the magic number moves off 5 (finally). Pirates blow a 6-1 lead, lose to Astros 7-6 in 15. 1.5 up, 4 to play. More to follow, dear reader, more to follow.

Deathwatch, Day 7

The Redbirds had lost 6 straight but, with the reigning NL Cy Young award winner going to the hill, one had to like their chances. Surely Chris Carpenter could (a) end the streak, (b) save the team from themselves, (c) provide some comfort to an increasingly uneasy fan base.

No, not so much.

Despite a gutsy 7 inning, 122 pitch effort, Carp hung around just long enough to give up 2 2-run doubles and watch the Padres erase a 5-2 deficit enroute to a 7-5 victory.

But this isn't Carp's fault. I lay the blame squarely at the feet of Tony the Idiot.

ITEM: Carp is pitching his heart out. He struggled to get out of the sixth, loading the bases with one out, before getting Padre shortstop Geoff Blum to hit into a force at home and 2B Jesse Barfield to fly out to right.

Seventh inning, more trouble. With two out and the bases loaded (again), Catcher Josh Bard doubles to right, driving in two and cutting the lead to 5-4. Chris is obviously gassed. The Idiot has waited too long to get Adam Wainwright up in the bullpen, so Carpenter has to stay out there to pitch to CF Cameron. His command is gone, the ball is all over the place. For someone who prides himself on match-ups, in a business where you have to think several hitters ahead to be ready, how is it possible the guy with 28 years managerial experience can't make a simple call to the bullpen and get someone up earlier? Carp got hung out to dry.

The Idiot did the same thing in Game 5 of the 2005 NLCS, leaving an obviously gassed Carp in the game to give up a 3-R HR to Lance "The Berk" Berkman which gave Houston a 4-2 lead. AP bailed him out that night. No one bailed him out tonight.

ITEM: All, and I mean ALL, the pitches to Cameron were supposed to be off the outside corner. First pitch: over the heart of the plate. Second pitch: over the outside half of the plate (Carp is missing his spots by 2-3 feet. Did we mention this is the most pitches he's thrown in a game this year?). Third pitch: where he wanted it. Cameron takes a weak swing and hits the ball down the right field line. But AP can't get to it, and it rolls into the corner for the killer 2-run double.

Now, are ALL the Cardinals bench coaches retarded? You throw 3 pitches off the outside corner. WHERE did they expect Cameron to hit the ball based on that pitching strategy? WHY in GOD'S NAME is Pujols playing in the hole between first and second? WHY in GOD'S NAME is Encarnacion playing in RC field? They must have expected him to pull the ball - a rookie might, perhaps, if he had his head up his ass, but not an experienced major league hitter.

STL had to have this game. HAD TO. The Idiot should have managed it like that - everyone's available, be aggressive, get this win. He didn't.

Tomorrow we turn our lonely eyes to Jason Marquis, whose issues we've chronicled previously, against SD's #2 starter, Chris Young. Yep. Staring 8 straight right in the face. We won't have to worry about playing SF the day after the season ends; Houston will probably have already clinched by then.


(It's OK, Jimmy - you won't remember this tomorrow.)

NFL Survivor, Week 4

OK, I like to gamble. A lot. Unfortunately, I'm not very good at it. The ABC's of gambling have no effect on me. In fact, I'm the guy invited over to play poker because SOMEONE's got to donate $40 to the winner. That's my Texas Hold 'Em role - stay in every hand, eat some pizza, drink a few beers, leave $40 dollars lighter. I'm not the only one out there. I can hear you breathing.

Of course, this sad fact hasn't driven the gambling gene from my body. Yet. So I have to find more creative ways to indulge, ones where I might actually have a shot. Blackjack is one. Knockout NFL pools are another. Miraculously, after three weeks, I'm still alive. It helps when you don't have to cover the spread, just pick a winner. I can DO this. Call it my gift.

A brief history of my picks so far this year:

Week 1 - NE. I've developed a strong dislike for Boston-area teams (see: SB XXXVI, 2004 WS), but I decided to throw Mrs. Rant's favorite team a bone. I was glad I was out of the house until NE tied the game at 17.
Week 2 - Ravens. I'm starting to think my HS team could compete with the Raiiiiiiders for at least a half. Gimme game on a weekend of gimme games.
Week 3 - Sehawks. Two thoughts here: NY had pulled off an emotional win at the Linc; all week we heard about this being a revenge game for the Giants. 35-0 Hawks at the half. Eli should be tested for colorblind-ness (which shade of blue is this? No, I'm sorry, you're wearing WHITE today). MAN I'm tired of being right.

So on to week 4. Here are the teams (and games) I recommend you choose a winner from:

1. ATLANTA (at home against Arizona). Cue the emotion theme from last week. Falcons get embarrassed on national (cable) TV in the Big Whine. Kurt Warner could put that loaf of bread in your bag, but not before he drops it 8 times. This game has possibilities.

2. DALLAS (at Tennessee). The Kerry Collins Experience is probably 2 weeks away from closing its doors forever. If you can't beat an atrocious Miami team, start selling insurance. LenDale White has shown more fight against all his teammates in practice than at any time on the field. Only trip hazard here is not only is it a road game, it's a road game involving Drew Bledsoe.

3. JACKSONVILLE (at Deadskins). Jag Hags KILLED the defending champs 2 weeks ago, but got handled in Indy. So some emotion there. The Potomac Warriors are a much better team with Clinton Portis scooting all over the field, but Pitt had a good running game - and we all know how that turned out when they played Jax.

4. PHILADELPHIA (at home against Lambeau Leapers). Team feels good after pushing around one of the Jay-Vee teams in the NFC West last week. The Iggles defense is much better than Detroit's, so Brett Favre's Ghost should have lots more trouble throwing the ball this week than he did last week. Oh, and the Lambeau Leapers have no running game.

Picking any of these 4 teams should get you through to the next week. Or you could pick the Lambs to beat Bert Lahr's favorite team - if, like, you want to live dangerously.